How much sex should I be having? Its a common question and there is no right or wrong answer. In my quest to help those who are seeking better, more fulfilling sex lives I wanted to do some research and find some valuable information to provide you with!
According to The Kinsey Institute (Statistics Found Here)
- 13% of married couples report having sex only a few times a year. 45% a few times a month and 34% report having sex 2-3 times a week. They also report that married couples who are more satisified in their marriage are more likely to have sex more frequently.
- On average, 18-29 year olds have sex 112 times per year, 30-39 year olds have sex on average 86 times per year and people ages 40-49 have sex on average 69 times per year.
If you don’t fall into these averages (say you have way more sex or way less) it doesn’t mean its not healthy or something is wrong! There is no NORMAL. What is normal for me, is completely different than what is normal for you. The thing that matters is that you are HAPPY with how much sex you are having! Robert Weiss wrote a great article on How Much Sex is Healthy? Its a great read for anyone interested in doing a little more research on how much sex is healthy!
So what if you find yourself wanting more sex but aren’t getting it?
So many things can cause us to put sex on the back burner; kids, work, money, physical ailments, and just stress in general. In order for us to make sex a priority we have to, sometimes…schedule it in. Super un-romantic, I know. But sex has so many health benefits its worth it to schedule it in! And hey it could reduce some of your stress in other areas! Even if you schedule a date night each week with your partner or plan on an early morning sack session it can boost your mood, lower your stress levels and increase the bond with your partner! (I’m a 100% morning sex kinda girl! Gives my day a little extra pizazz and puts me in a great mood all day long!)
Get creative, maybe the reason your not having enough sex is because your bored with the sex your having? Spice it up! Incorporate toys, try some new moves or positions. Pick up a book with some ideas that you can share with your partner! Open communication about what you like and don’t like will help to give some inspiration for some new moves in the bedroom. If you’re uncomfortable talking to your partner, play a game that promotes communication or consider talking to a sex therapist. They’re trained to help you work through communicating together about your sexual wants and needs!
There’s no shame if you don’t want to have sex all the time. Not everyone does, not everyone wants it all the time. Thats ok too. Everyone is different, so whats right for me may be completely different than whats right for you! Don’t compare yourself to your friends or neighbors because whats normal for them might not be normal for you!
Most of all have FUN! Sex should be fun! Enjoy yourself, have great orgasms, laugh with your partner, make having sex a great time!
*I am still patiently holding on to that goodie basket to give away! We’re nearly at 50 followers! Share my blog with your friends and once we reach 50 followers, I’ll be sending some vibrating love your way!